This event from yesterday impacted me so much that I am double-posting part of it from the food blog. Here’s what happened:
the problem was, I didn’t get enough sleep last night. I went to bed really late and got up unrested and so that was the wrong foot. It’s a Monday after a nice celebratory weekend. I went to work and the poor guy I had to work with was just a miserable soul in a lot of pain. I felt for him, and his pain leeched into me.
So by 11:30am I was just feeling terrible. Exhausted, cold (SO cold!), sad, lonely, (this is my not-so-social work place, as opposed to my super buddy workplace) and just DOWN. I began plotting all the ways I could comfort myself at lunchtime. I would take myself to this restaurant across the street that has ginormous portions of comfort food. I told myself I’d “forget” to bring my camera. YIKES.
But I was trying to be mindful. I was trying to recognize the fact that I was actively planning to use food for non-food distress. (even though hunger was part of the mix too) I teased it out in my head. I told myself, I could go to a soup place instead, and that way I could take care of cold, hunger and comfort all at once. That was a really good first step. Then I felt willing to bring my camera.
THEN I had a REAL stroke of genius. (ha!) I remembered that it was Monday, the only day of the week when Mr. McBody and I work about 2 blocks apart from each other. I texted him. “Lunch?” He had already eaten, but he said he’d come meet me. I waited on the street corner and man, I was never so happy to see someone. I really felt like he was literally saving me from a binge.
And it was like: OMG. I wanted comfort. And I got REAL LIVE human comfort. How fantastic was that!! He gave me the biggest hug. And all of a sudden I didn’t even need the soup. I was warm! I was loved!
We went to my favorite salad bar place and he sat with me while I ate my salad and listened to my woes and then gave me another big hug. And then I felt like I could make it through the afternoon.
I actually can’t stop thinking about this and I credit the reading of Savor (which I love) – about slowing that moment down, being mindful, and saying, what do I REALLY need?
I was hungry. I needed food. But what KIND of food?
I was cold. I put on my jacket.
I was lonely and needed comfort. I called out for my dear spouse, who luckily was close by.
I was tired. I had a cup of coffee because I couldn’t really go for a nap at the moment. But it taught me that going to bed early is key.
I was so ready to go and get some plate of SOMETHING to deal with all those things when in fact it would have helped none of them, not even the hunger, because it would have most likely been something regretful that I would then feel physically and emotionally bad about.
I’m learning! I’m really learning.
August 17, 2010 at 3:55 pm
LOVE this post. thanks susan.
August 17, 2010 at 4:00 pm
Oh wow…my eyes are welling up. This is exactly what I get from Mr. KCLAnderson. How very blessed we are.
August 17, 2010 at 4:03 pm
I LOVE THIS!!!!
For some reason I was expecting you to go somewhere else with the post. I thought you were going to tell us how you failed yesterday. But you kicked butt!
August 17, 2010 at 4:40 pm
Thanks! Er, believe me, I have PLENTY of those “fail” blog posts! So this is a big deal! 🙂
August 17, 2010 at 8:21 pm
This is a great post! 🙂 So glad you found comfort in a different form. 🙂
August 18, 2010 at 12:08 am
I love that Mr. Mcbody saved the day 🙂 You amaze me Susan! Way to go on moving past the emotional blahs and making good food choices. That is a tough one so any time you dodge the emotional eating monster inside of you is pretty much super power at its best 😉
August 18, 2010 at 3:05 am
I got part of this story because I was there on Twitter when you were tweeting, but this is more detailed. Made me teary-eyed.
I love Mr. McBody for coming to your aide. That is so sweet. Something my hubby would do–come be with me even though he has eaten. It is so awesome and makes me happy when spouses are so awesome!
Thank you for sharing!