lessons learned

Ahhh Saturday: Fitbloggin’ Recap Part 3!!!!!

227269_172293072827467_100001403265795_419195_3377509_n — photo credit: @BrittGettinFit

Yes folks, we are coming down to the home stretch! The final day of Fitbloggin’! Follow @foodiemcbody

I have to admit to “sleeping in” until the late hour of 8am on Saturday. It appears that none of us set the alarm. But then I peeked at my phone and my Twitter stream was blowing up with “bacon! bacon! bacon!” and I knew that Ryan of @NoMoreBacon was starting his panel (<– check out the liveblogging recap) with @yumyucky @esthercrawford and @priorfatgirl! Yikes!! We tossed on our clothes and ran for the elevator.

This second day of Fitbloggin’ was pretty much all presentations. I’m sure that there were all sorts of logistical reasons for this, ie room setup logistics, chair moving and the like, but it felt like Friday was so physical – running and jumping and dancing and lifting (and performing!) and Saturday was all… sitting. And staying inside. I wonder if there could be more of a mixup of physical/mental next year.

It was so, so hard to choose between sessions in the amazing schedule. I had come to the conference with the intention of learning all kinds of stuff so I could improve my blog (I admit I am completely stuck on Blog 101!), but in the end I made all of my decisions for purely social reasons. I went to panels so I could see/support the people who were on them. So I missed the photography panel, and the website analytics talk, and the design workshop and SEO (I still don’t know what the heck that is, which is why I have about 4 blog readers) and self-hosting. Thank goodness for the wonderful people who did live recaps and thanks to Roni for posting them!

I did go to the session on Building an Online Community, which was really good. It ranged from JulieJulie (my carpool/plane buddy from Day 1!), who has a small-but-a-lot-bigger-than-mine community blog, ranging all the way up to DailyBurn, which is like… GINORMOUS.

Next up, I went to a panel featuring my awesome roommate Karen CL Anderson, as well as Katie Heddleston, Christie Inge and the amazing Shauna Reid. The topic was “Ditch the Diet: Eating Intuitively.” Now I have to admit, I went into this feeling some amount of trepidation. I could feel my stomach scrunching up throughout this panel, every time Weight Watchers was mentioned with contempt or distaste. I could feel the confusion from the audience – including one woman who had victoriously reached her goal weight this week – and now hearing that maybe it was better to NOT use a scale, to not have goals, to eat “intuitively.” It was a very emotionally charged panel, and I know it spoke powerfully to many in the audience. Many panelists said things that I felt myself nodding at, and other things, I just felt the invisible arrows flying through the air. It reinforced to me that there are an infinite number of ways to “DO” this journey. I just felt sad hearing people bashing WW from the stage, and nobody up there saying what an awesome program it can be. (Dave Kirchhoff, you gotta come to Fitbloggin 2012!) I had to keep silently reminding myself that people weren’t attacking ME.

One of the best things that came out of that panel was the powerful question, “How do you know when It is Working?” If you’re not using a scale, or other measures, then what does “Working” mean? The variety of answers around that question was fantastic. It’s a great and important question, whether you’re “dieting” or not. I loved Shauna’s answer, which was that she knew it was “working” when she ate only 2 finger of a KitKat bar instead of all four!

After that panel, it was time for another awesome lunch. Then, more decisions. I decided to go to the Humor in Blogging panel, mostly because I am a mad fan of the panelists: JackSh*t, Mrs. Fatass and the fabulous Charlie, who showed up in a purple cape AND took a pee break during the session! What can I say about this panel except that it was funny and I laughed a lot.

Sue O'Lear, aka Mrs Fatass, has a funny!

Then there was a panel on Blogger Responsibility. I was fascinated by this topic but it was another one that sort of irked and perplexed me. It was based on the premise that bloggers need to be careful (or do they?) about what they write, because they could, as Marie Claire magazine accused, trigger their readers and turn them toward dangerous or unhealthy behavior.

The whole idea of this panel seemed unnecessary to me. But it’s easy for me to say since I have just a teeny handful of susceptible readers, compared to the likes of some of the superstars up there. Do we need to write a disclaimer if we’re going to write about weighing ourselves, or setting a goal, or counting calories or running a marathon? Will people reading it feel competitive, or unworthy or what?

Carla (aka @mizfitonline), deeply listening

I don’t know. I guess I feel like my own blog can’t really affect anyone that much, and if it affects them at all, I’d hope it would be in a good direction. I do know that some people felt tweaked and “triggered” when I started keeping a food blog. All I could do was hope that they would not look at it, that they would avoid something they knew would upset them. My feeling is that ANYthing can trigger ANYbody, and if we spend too much time censoring ourselves against who might be triggered, well then we’d never write a word. Those are my two cents on “blogger responsibility.” What do you think??

I wrote recently about being triggered – BIG TIME- by this solo show I went to in 2009. At the time, it was terribly upsetting. But in the end it triggered me INTO this journey, it triggered me into health and the life I have now. So I also believe that sometimes triggers that feel bad can end up being good things.

Once, many years ago, someone I cared about said something very hurtful about my, er, state of underemployment. Some people could see me as a part-time worker or stay at home mom (I never saw myself with that label), but this person said I was “mooching” off my husband. OW. OW OW OW OW!!!!!!!! I think the reason that stung so much is that deep down, I worried about the same thing. I went out and started working that year, and it led me into the most meaningful work of my life. So, yeah, triggers can be a good thing. Sometimes it’s just what we need.

The keynote session featured radio personalities, Dr. Fitness & the Fat Guy, who are pretty much the Click ‘N Clack of the fitness world. They had interviewed me (for one minute!) earlier on for one of the Fitness Minutes, and during their keynote they did a great impromptu interview with FatGirlVsWorld. They’re a total hoot (but also an awesome resource) -you oughta check them out!

Okay my dearies, that’s enough for now. I’m almost at the end of this epic tale! Coming next: The Friends I Made and Met.

June 1, 2011 12

Fitbloggin’ 2011: Or, Moby Dick Part 1

I’ve been putting off writing this mega-recap of Fitbloggin‘ because I know it’s going to take hours and hours. It was such a HUGE experience and I’ve been having difficulty processing it all in my head. I know I’m not the only one. It was an incredible event and I’ve been contemplating- do I tell it chronologically? (like my race recaps, from beginning to end) or topically, thematically? I think what I’m going to do is write it chronologically, but then I’m going to have to write separate blog posts for big themes that come up. Sigh. This could take a long time. Bear with me, people!

I have to start with the plane flight there because it was hilarious, “meeting” another Fitbloggin’ attendee by realizing (via Twitter) that we were both boarding the same flight from Salt Lake City –> Baltimore. While waiting at the gate, I saw on Twitter that another blogger, Julie had checked-in at Salt Lake City. I peered at her tiny little avatar photo and tried to match it up with people at the gate. I tweeted, “Are you at C-5?” but she didn’t seem to have her phone on. When I sat down, I tweeted, “I’m in seat 22F”! and then figured it would be a mystery. About halfway through the flight, a super friendly face stopped by my row and said, “Are you Foodie? I’m sorry, but I don’t know what your real name is!” It was @Juliejulie!! I think the guys in my row were like, “Uh….wha????”

At the baggage claim, we met up with Mara of Medicinal Marzipan and the party began! My roommate Karen was on her way to pick me up and we all got in the car together. Good times! Happy Times!

Karen, our lovely personal Fitbloggin' driver!

Got to the Marriott. Wow, Baltimore is pretty. I hadn’t realized that during my last work trip in February. It’s totally cool! We checked-in to the Fitbloggin desk and got our GINORMOUS bags of swag which included New Balance running shoes (whaaat?), cute beanie caps with MP3 speakers at the ears, and a pile of other stuff. Also the coolest name badges ever which we got to decorate ourselves. Yay! I heart stickers! The opening social was kind of a whirlwind chaos of meeting people for the first time, eating yummy snacks, hugging (yeah I wore my Free Hugs shirt), jumping on trampolines, poking people with our Pokens (coolest little gizmo ever – you stick your little hand next to their little hand and when the palms turn green, voila! your contact info has been exchanged!) and just brain-exploding WOW WE ARE HERE!

@paolo and Luke getting their Pokens together

Friday night I had one of the awesomest crabcakes ever, at dinner with my roommates in the hotel restaurant. YUMMY!

Friday morning I woke up at 6am, to get ready for the 7am 5k. Mind you, this was 3am California time, and I’d gotten up at 2am California time to catch my flight the day before. I was running on pure adrenaline fumes!

I was wearing my Totoro hat, which I’d brought two of, one to share with my Asian twin/sister/buddy Jess. But sadly Jess could not make it to Fitbloggin and I had an extra, empty Totoro hat. (insert sad face)

As other people have pointed out, Fitbloggin’ is not the most racially diverse event one could find. Which was why Jess and I were so excited to be Asian buddies together. Without her, it was lookin’ like just me and @Paolo. Did this matter? Not reallllllllllllly. But at the same time, there’s a certain comfort in not feeling like the only One of something.

A lot of people were not quite sure what to make of my Totoro hat. One person Tweeted that I was wearing a “manga cat” hat. Hahaha! NOT a cat. Then Kia (aka @bodhi_bear) went wild went she saw it! TOTOROOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! and I knew she was the one who had to have the twin hat.

The 5k commenced out back of the hotel. It was allegedly a run-walk thing, but I could immediately feel the SPEED in the front-runners and I knew people were going much faster than my norm. It’s hard for me especially in smaller race crowds to “find my own pace” and not want to keep up with everyone else. It takes a lot to FOCUS when it seems like everyone is passing you. And yet when I run too fast for my own body, I struggle, and that just doesn’t feel good.

It was a beautiful run along the water and past some cute shops and cafes. The weather was pretty much perfect, maybe in the 50s, not too hot or cold, and it didn’t rain as threatened. So it was pretty much an awesome run. But on the way back, the runners were so spread out, I couldn’t see the group ahead of me. I ended up getting a little lost (and taking a few people with me: SORRY!) and doing an extra half-mile or so.

This rockstar @dubyawife ran her first 5k at Fitbloggin! As did several others.

The sponsors at Fitbloggin were absolutely awesome. From the swag to the events to the meals to the giveaways, it was just so well supported. Yay sponsors!

@Attune foods gave us a yummy breakfast and nutrition lecture. And a cute bamboo spoon!

yummy cherry smoothies from the Cherry folks!

After breakfast there commenced a huge number of other fitness sessions, none of which I wanted to miss! But I was sweaty. And shivery from the air conditioning on top of cold sweat. And TIRED! But as I said, I wanted to miss nothing. Except the Zumba.

There was an awesome kettlebell demonstration by my roommate Karen, @fitmommy and @girl-heroes. WOW they knew how to swing those things. I was inspired.

IMG_3932_2 — @kclanderson in her Rather Provocative Shirt

But there was more! My hero and friend MizFitonline (aka Carla Birnberg) gave a great demo on resistance training with bands and the UgiFit ball. (a huge, soft, 8 lb medicine ball that smells just like a new car)

another contender for "best T-shirt" @mizfitonline

The awesome thing is there was a drawing for an Ugi ball (NOT CHEAP!) and… I won! I won! I won!!!!! I can’t even describe how happy this made me.

And… with that… I’m gonna have to take a break. Midmorning Friday! Oh man. I’ll be back. There’s so much more to talk about. But this little recap has taken the better part of 3 hours and I got much else to do this sunny Sunday.

If you were at Fitbloggin, I know you have your own recaps but please feel free to chime in about ANY of these happenings! And if you weren’t there, ask questions. It was freaking awesome.

Back later!

May 29, 2011 14

The Power of Art

Two years ago, the same week that I received my diabetes diagnosis, I attended a night of solo performance. I was going to see a friend of mine, but as is often the case, she was performing in a showcase with a few other people I didn’t know. One of them was a woman named Lisa-Marie. I had no idea what her show was about, but as the lights came up and she started acting the part of her mother, “Lisa! Lisa! We have to check your numbers!” I knew that it was about diabetes. And it was. The friends I had come with started tossing concerned glances my way. They knew I had been fairly traumatized by this news from my doctor.

Turns out that Lisa-Marie has Type 1 Diabetes, what used to be called “juvenile diabetes” because she was diagnosed as a child. And in one scene, she was ranting about how frustrating it is to be misunderstood for that “OTHER” kind of diabetes, the kind that fat people who eat too many cheeseburgers get.

Ouch.

I remember slumping down in my seat, my face burning with embarrassment. I think I had a bit of an out-of-body experience for a few minutes. Yeah. That’s the kind of diabetes that *I* had. The kind that you bring on yourself. The kind where it’s all your fault (you disgusting pig). I died a million deaths during that 15 minute show, and when it was over I fled the theater like I’d been set on fire.

Well. Funny how life turns out. Last week I did a performance of my own show, and guess who else was in my lineup? Yes, none other than the same Lisa-Marie, who did an amazing piece about breast cancer (entitled “Nice Rack.” It was fabulous). And I knew that I had to talk to her about her show, and my show, and my life, and how it all linked together.

And I was talking to her, I realized (huge flash) that even though seeing her show had been absolutely excruciating back then, it also solidified in me a feeling of “HELL NO. Nobody is ever, ever, ever going to talk about me and MY diabetes that way.” And I realize now that it was a very very real and clear catalyst for my getting healthy. She was one of the things that pushed me into my journey in a very real way. And while her show had upset and embarrasssed me, it also was one of the greatest gifts I could’ve gotten.

Right in the midst of my own performance on Wednesday night (dress rehearsal for my performance at Fitbloggin next week!!), I added a line just for her. 🙂 “Oh no. I brought this on myself. I can’t tell anybody. I’m so embarrassed. I know what they say about people who get Type 2 diabetes – that happpens to people who too many cheeseburgers…. but… I don’t eat THAT many cheeseburgers. Do I?” It’s sort of a poignant/funny line, and now I know it’s going to stay in there.

It’s kind of amazing to me how many people come up to me after a performance and say, “I have prediabetes. But I haven’t done anything about it. But now…” Or the same thing about a family member or friend. And I hope that maybe my show can be the same kind of catalyst for them.

I didn’t make myself have diabetes, not 100% anyway. Genetics does that. But once I have it I can choose to ignore it or manage it and be as healthy as I can anyway. That’s what I choose.

Now I’m dreaming up ways that Lisa-Marie and I can do our shows together, the voices of Type 1 and Type 2 diabetes coming together. How cool would THAT be.

Has a performance/book/movie/painting or other piece of art ever influenced how you lived YOUR life?

May 8, 2011 5

The Binge That Wasn’t

Kleenex, a photo by Nele en Jan on Flickr.

I thought for sure I was headed for some sort of binge today. I could feel a intense vibrating inside my body, which in years past was almost a precursor to a mindless snarfing down of any edible thing in my path. Today was the funeral of a friend and colleague of mine, who died last week. But I’ve been numb for a week, numb and busy and somehow not really able to comprehend that her death (unexpected and tragic) was true.

This morning as I prepared to go to the service, I knew that I was going to have to face what I had tried to avoid all week. And as I said, I could feel this vibration inside me, this out of control shaking that in the past could only be calmed with food. This feeling that I could fly apart into a thousand pieces if I didn’t somehow anesthetize myself.

I was nervous. But also somewhat resigned. It was going to happen. A voice inside me didn’t care. It was ready. I went into the service feeling defeated, but also a sense of “Whatever it takes to get through this.”

Soon after I got there one of my dearest friends came and sat next to me. I could feel myself starting to fall apart. Seeing all the people who loved and cared for this person. Someone came up to me and said, “You have to keep it together for all the rest of us.” I think I literally squeaked, “ME?” and then shook my head like, oh no, I’m not taking that job. Because I have been keeping it together all week – in meetings, on the phone, in the office, at my work. And I knew today that it was all going to come down.

As I listened to my friend’s family members- her brother and sister and dear friends, and our mutual boss and friend – speak about her, I could feel myself slowly “leaking.” The tears were dripping down. And then finally one of my camp counselors got up to speak and I just freaking LOST IT. I sobbed totally out of control.

It was a beautiful, wrenching, excruciating and incredible service. And when it was over and I got up to go to the catered luncheon, I knew that I was not going to binge out. That vibrating feeling? Had been totally calmed after I had my good cry.

It was one of those moments.

May 4, 2011 8

Stories of the Body: A Retreat

I’ve already written up an information page about the retreat I’ll be hosting in September, but I really wanted to blog about it, to have the meandering freedom to explain just what this thing is and why I think it’s going to be so incredibly awesome.

First, the place. I’ve been visiting Santa Sabina for hourlong to weeklong retreats for over twenty years now. I stumbled upon it when I first went to a week-long calligraphy retreat (I used to be a calligrapher! Little known fact!) and felt I’d found a piece of paradise. Santa Sabina was once a convent for Dominican nuns and is now a retreat center. But the lovely simple rooms, the chapel, the courtyard meditation garden, the Hermitage (where one can be a “hermit” for a time!) are all a true sanctuary for the soul. Since then, I have spent days there writing, reading, sleeping, dreaming. Just being in this beautiful is deeply healing and soothing. So it is a dream of mine to be able to host a retreat there (where I have attended many).

One of the beautiful things about Santa Sabina is the many opportunities for silence, which is so scarce in our everyday lives. We eat our meals (except for final lunch) in silence. It is truly an amazing experience. Have you ever tried it? We will pass certain parts of each day in quiet contemplation. Some of us might write. Or sleep. Or walk. But it is a gift to spend a part of a day without having to talk (or listen!). It can be astonishingly rich.

I’ve changed the name of this retreat three times now. First, I called it “Body My House: A Retreat” which was symbolic of this poem which I love so much by May Swenson:

Question

Body my house
my horse my hound
what will I do
when you are fallen

Where will I sleep
How will I ride
What will I hunt

Where can I go
without my mount
all eager and quick
How will I know
in thicket ahead
is danger or treasure
when Body my good
bright dog is dead

How will it be
to lie in the sky
without roof or door
and wind for an eye

With cloud for shift
how will I hide?

I often think about my body – is it my horse, my hound, my house, my prison? Then I realized that perhaps this title was too abstract and people might not have any clue what it was about. So I changed it to “Writing the Body.” Which led to some people being wildly enthusiastic (writers!) and other people feeling maybe somewhat intimidated (“I’m not a writer”).

So I’ve now come to “Stories of the Body: A Retreat.” How many times will this evolve before September? Only time will tell! Because my intention is for the stories to emerge in whatever way we choose. Many of us will choose writing. We will share some poems and prose about the body to prime the pump. But I want to stress that no writing experience is necessary. At all. There will be some writing prompts, and this may inspire some of us in a wordy kind of way. But the lovely thing about Santa Sabina is that it invites so many different forms of expression. There is an absolutely wonderful art basement with separate rooms and nooks for collage making, painting, papermaking, calligraphy, crayons, oil pastels, water painting (it vanishes in a minute!) and more. There are numerous places to just sit and BE. The weekend will be a place to let the stories float to the surface in many forms. A time to just be with these bodies and see what they have to tell us. I’m also planning some lovely opportunities for moving (walking meditation, an optional hike, and maybe some Nia or yoga). People who want to treat their bodies to a massage can do so. There will be times for sharing and times for being alone and quiet.

The reason I’m organizing this event is to turn to another, deeper facet of seeking health and wholeness. I want to go beyond fitness challenges and counting calories – all of which have served me immensely – to a more contemplative place. Because I feel like this is the piece that is most often missing when we are seeking health, weight loss, transformation – really understanding the stories we have been told , the stories that we tell and that we deeply believe about ourselves.

I am currently seeking some event sponsors to see if I can get some kind of scholarship fund together, to lessen the costs or perhaps provide some travel stipends if possible. If there are any event sponsors out there who would like to support this weekend, please let me know!

This is not going to be a huge event. Maximum participation is 35 people and we already have quite a few registrations. There is a deep discount for Early Bird registrants, people who sign up with a buddy and people who spread the word. 🙂 Full details are available here. Comment here if you have any questions. I am so looking forward to this event, and I am hoping that you will join us.

April 25, 2011 3

Prisoner: A Guest Post by Tara

I am so unbelievably honored and thrilled to introduce you all to Tara of Life Changing Journey, who is one of my person heroes. Her honesty and determination and sheer willingness to do WHATEVER IT TAKES (physically, emotionally, spiritually) to find health and wholeness – just blows me away. Tara, thank you for being here. Okay readers, are you ready?? Have Kleenex at hand.

—————————————–

For the first 40 years of my life, I abused my body. I used it to hide my emotions. I used it to comfort my fears and frustrations. I used it to shield me from the hurt and pain that I longed to stop feeling. I didn’t move it. I didn’t take care of it. I didn’t love it one bit. In fact, I hated it. I hated my body and I made damn sure my body knew it.

I became a prisoner in my own skin.

I locked myself in and threw away the key. Every year I had fleeting thoughts that maybe this would be the year that I changed. This would be the year I would learn to love and care for myself. This would be the year I would free myself from the prison I had lived in for so long….

Then the year would pass I would still hate myself. Still couldn’t stand to look at the person in the mirror. Still couldn’t bring myself to have a little faith that I deserved to live a better life. I resigned myself to living the life of a morbidly obese woman that found very little enjoyment out of life except for when I was playing video games or indulging in an emotional eating episode…

Funny thing about my body…

It never gave up on me. It would open up that cage door and give me the opportunity to stand up and walk out of my emotional prison. Every time I turned it down, my body would wait patiently. Again it would open the door ever so slightly and wait for me to finally believe…

I’m free of my prison now. Life on the outside is more beautiful than I ever imagined. I’m so far away from that prison cell that I have a hard time remembering what it was like being there. Locked away. Slowly dying, emotionally and physically, and not really caring. Now I care. I care more than I ever thought possible. I will fight tooth and nail and to my death to never return to that prison. I’m still scared, frustrated and learning to live in my emotions but can I let you in on a little secret?

The view is so much better out here.

I don’t know where you are on your journey. Maybe you’ve locked yourself in and thrown away the key. Maybe the years have come and gone and you too wonder if you’ll ever stand up and leave the confines of you cell. Maybe you’ve abused your body and you think that there is no way it’s going to do what you ask what you ask it to do. Maybe you’re afraid to unlock your cell door and see what’s out here. Listen, you get to unlock that door. Do you hear me: You get to unlock the heavy door that you thought would never move. You get to push it wide open, you get to step across the threshold and embark on the journey of a lifetime.

One slow step at a time.

Until you realize that you deserve this.

Your body already knows that.

Let it prove it to you.

~ Tara

April 14, 2011 7

The Book I Was Going to Write: Guest Post by Karen!

I’m thrilled to host author and blogger Karen CL Anderson here at my blog. She was one of my first friends in the blogosphere, and we “clicked” right away because of our love of writing and our desire to tell the “inner stories” of our bodies, our weight journeys. I think she’s awesome and so excited about her new book!

Ten years ago, if you were to ask me which would be the greater accomplishment – being thin or writing a book – I would have said being thin. No question about it. At the time I weighed ~230 pounds and even though I actually was a writer (at the time I was a plastics industry trade magazine reporter and editor), I had no confidence in my ability to write. In my mind, I wasn’t a “real” writer.

And very much like I used say, “someday I’ll lose weight,” I also used to say “some day I’ll write a book.”

Five years ago, I was the thinnest I’d been in my entire adult life. I had really worked for it, too. Not only was I was counting calories and exercising regularly, I was working on the emotional stuff. I was fully aware that this was a “lifestyle change” and that figuring out the “why’s” was just as important as the calories in/calories out equation.

I was also a weight-loss “success story” with my picture on the cover of a weekly women’s magazine and I appeared in a national commercial for a popular weight loss web site. I thought I had it all figured out and wanted to share my secrets with the world. That is the book I was going to write.

But.

But there was something holding me back…even though I had achieved something I never thought possible, I still had doubts and no real confidence in myself. And the biggest problem of all was that I hadn’t reached my goal weight…I was still 20 pounds away. Deep down inside I didn’t feel worthy.

What happened next was predictable: over the course of a year or so, I regained half the weight I had lost. Along with the pounds came panic, shame, frustration, and anger. I wallowed in self-pity a bit, I punished myself a lot, and I was desperate. I hated my body.

And that’s when I started to really write. My best writing was born out of pain and frustration, not success. At first, I did it for myself. Then I started blogging. It didn’t take long before I realized that I had found my voice, and along with it came a bit of confidence. Then came self-acceptance and the realization that if I could just love and accept myself enough, my body might just respond in kind. And it did.

And that’s when I realized that I truly had something of value to say. And so I took what I had written, edited it, added to it and published a book. It seemed like the right thing to do…a natural progression of the love and acceptance I was finally allowing myself to feel.

I can honestly say now that I am glad I regained that weight. It gave me an opportunity to really know and understand myself in a way that I never had before. I am more than just a number on a scale. My value does not depend on whether or not I’ve lost weight. And because I know that, my body does too.

Karen’s book, AFTER (the before & after) is the result of her belief that having a healthy body (mind and spirit) shouldn’t be a life-long struggle. It is NOT just another book about how to lose weight. It’s about the power of self-acceptance, and it’s about realizing that it takes as long as it needs to take. And that’s okay.

Her blog, “Before & After: A Real Life Story” (http://kclanderson.com/before-and-after) chronicles the lessons she continues to learn.

To learn more about AFTER (the before & after) and to read excerpts from the book, please visit: http://booklocker.com/books/5321.html

April 10, 2011 5

Fatty McWHAT?!? A Guest Post from Jack Sh*t

I’m thrilled to bits to introduce my readers to Jack Sh*t, who is one of the funniest (and underneath it all, most serious about health & weight loss) bloggers out there in the blogosphere. He is one of the first bloggers I found on my “journey” and he has been a constant reminder that if we don’t laugh and have a good time on the way, there’s really no point. I consider him the King of the Index Cards, made most famous by his WIDTH (Why I Do This Here) campaign – Why DO you do what you’re doing?? (feel free to answer this on an index card of your own and send it to him!)

Jack, thanks so much for visiting, and, um… completely forgetting my name! Ah, maturity, it’s a lovely thing.

April 8, 2011 10

Yoga KICKED MY BUTT. But I might go back…

I haven’t done yoga in many, many years. In fact you might say I have had a yoga phobia. I’m not even sure why.

When I was in college (like a million years ago!) my boyfriend and I took up a home course in Bikram yoga after seeing the extremely sexy and appealing yoga-in-a-Turkish-prison scene in Midnight Express. It looked pretty irresistable. So we bought this book, and I bought a Danskin leotard (LOL) and we commenced to learn the poses along with Bikram and his cast of inflexible movie stars. (he had these hilarious pose photos – you can do it perfectly like Bikram here, but if you are a normal person with hamstrings of concrete, you may do it like … Debbie Reynolds!) But seeing the imperfect movie stars was kind of reassuring.

After that one stint of doing yoga in- what – 1978? I stopped and actually have not been back since. I’ve had a weird chip on my shoulder and I don’t even know why. At some point I came to associate yoga with sanctimonious Cafe Gratitude– type vegans AND with women who put on makeup and $150 Lululemon clothes to exercise. I mean, if you’re going to do yoga, I kind of think you ought to be doing it while wearing rags on a concrete floor. LOL. It’s supposed to be a spiritual practice, not a practice in consumerism and looking stylish.

Also, I can’t sit upright with my legs extended and since you have to do that ALL THE TIME in yoga, it makes me feel cranky and inadequate. Maybe that’s the REAL reason.

BUT… my friend who moved to New York was back in town for just a few days, and she invited me to her favorite yoga class, and said the instructor is AMAZING, and then we were going to go to the Bakesale for Japan together, and it’s really the only opportunity we had to get together, so… what the heck. I went.

First of all. This was a Level 2-3 class. Hahahaha. Second of all, it was PACKED. (popular teacher/ Saturday morning) Thirdly, I thought it was an hour class but it turned out to be 90 minutes more like 100 because he went overtime. YOW.

It started out innocuously enough. Some “getting in touch with your breath/body” stuff which segued into some very gentle neck stretches, and it had been going on forever, and I thought, not so bad.

Then it got bad.

There was a lot of downward dog and plank activity, and warrior pose stuff and even flying on one leg, but the thing that got to me was the Rabbit. (picture above) Except we not only did it like the picture, we also did it while our back quarters were still downward dogging, and one leg up in the air. We were to put all the weight of our bodies on our HAIRLINE. I mean, ow.

This yoga is no joke, people. I have had a few forays into “gentle” yoga or “restorative” yoga and this was a total kickass workout. I was shaking and trembling and sweating and really FEELING IT. It felt like it went on and on forever, but in fact it was around 95 minutes. Give or take.

When it was over, I was trembling like a scared Chihuaha for about an hour. I felt really… shaky. But then after that I felt good. Really good.

That’s my takeaway message. I’m probably going to do more yoga because it’s like good medicine. I think it’s good for me and does things that my other workouts don’t do. I’m going to start investigating different classes and see which ones might be a good fit for me. This one was pretty hardcore. At one point people were actually doing HEADSTANDS and I was like… whaaaaattttt? No way I was even going to go there. But it was good, and I do think another barrier was broken in Foodie McBody-land.

After the class we went over to the main Bakesale for Japan location. In my mind I was thinking this might be a day when I’d break my chip vow and try some sugar. Everything looked freaking AMAZING. But in the end, I decided it wasn’t worth it to me. I took a tiny nibble of something called a “sesame stick” and it was on the sweet side so I didn’t eat any more. But I also got some miso pork (made from Sendai miso, how perfect could that be?) and some farm eggs and little cheddar crisps made from cheese and black rice – wow, right? Yum.

It was a good day. And I definitely stayed on track, both exercise and sugarwise. Yay!

Tell me: what do YOU think of yoga? What kind do you do? What kind do you like?

April 2, 2011 19

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