March 6, 2009

I have a much biggest post I want to write today but not sure the schedule will allow. But I did just have a happy moment I have to share!

I had this really nice blouse last year, one of my favorites. It was dry-clean only but somehow it got tossed into the washer. AND the dryer. It shrunk down tiny tiny. There was no way I could squeeze into it. I wrote it off. I made a note to one day donate it somewhere or give to one of my small friends. 🙂

WELL. Today after I got out of shower, I was standing there perusing my closet. I put on some black pants. Then I glimpsed my long-lost pretty blouse. I wondered… could it be possible?

IT FIT! IT FIT! IT FIT! I am wearing it now. I am doing the happy Snoopy dance.

In other brief news, I had the best workout this morning. Normally I do two circuits of this rather grueling workout, with my trainer. I usually have to rush off after that (it takes an hour total) and besides, I’m pooped. And usually I work out with just him. (which is great) But today the gym was very busy and these two guys, whom I have worked out with in the past (more than a year ago) ended up showing up at the same time. We all worked out together. I was so pumped!! It just boosted my energy 100x more to have two other people to work out with. So I told my trainer I had some extra time, and I wanted to do 3 circuits. His eyes popped out and he got all happy and psyched and so the three of us did three. I was really happy. I had done more than I thought I could do. I was about to leave, and this one guy got this gleam in his eye. He goes, “Four?” And I just knew I had it in me. I could feel my engine revving. “Yeah!” So we did the fourth circuit and I was so adrenalized and happy and proud and full of energy. It was a long, intense, two hour workout. I felt so happy when I left.

Then I came home, showered, and put on my shrunken shirt!! Hee!!

Much better day than yesterday.

…. but I didn’t.

It was one of those uber-emotional over the top days when the stress level is SO HIGH and in the “bad old days” – um, just 10 weeks ago? I would have just been inhaling everything in sight. There was major drama going on at work, my blood pressure was (probably) hitting the roof, I was extremely concerned about a loved one, and I was this close to having my head explode.

I work right next to a 7-11. Which is the perfect source for out of control emotional eating. Haagen Dasz bars! Skor bars! 7-11 hot dogs!! (ha) More junk than you can stuff in your mouth.

I really love my job. I love the people I work with. I love the work I do. And so for me to have a “bad day at work” is like one in a million. But today I was just triggered and set off and I was a basket case. Then I was worried about somebody that I love, and that was hard too. (understatement)

I didn’t have breakfast because I was rushing too much. Then I got to work and dealt with drama for several hours. My mom, who had come to the office with me (she’s a volunteer there) wanted to stop and get a drive-through burger. I almost got nothing for myself and then thought better of it and got a drive-through chicken salad. Which turned out to be a great thing. She sat at my desk and ate the burger and fries while I inhaled the fumes.

After all the drama, I ate my salad which was actually very very good. I had a plan to visit a friend this afternoon so I left my office. I walked past the 7-11 to go to my car. The junk food was calling my name. LOUDLY. I did not have time to sit down and Write Out My Feelings. I made myself steadily KEEP WALKING and felt in my pocket. Voila, there was a sugar free caramel hard candy!! It saved me. I sucked on that thing til it disappeared. I drove to my friends house. She gave me a cup of tea, a cut up apple and some tangerine (she is a good good friend!). I told her all my woes, and while I was talking to her I got a relieving text message from my loved one. Things took a turn for the better. She helped me get more grounded regarding the work situation, and when I left her house I felt a million times better.

I came home and had a nice healthy dinner with my family.

The only “down” thing is I did not exercise today. Trainer said I could have one rest day, not two. But now I am post-dinner, and I do not think I can do anything comfortably. I will just have an extra vigorous workout in the morning.

I am very relieved and actually SHOCKED that I did not overeat today. I really think I might be learning some new ways of coping.

Amazing.

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Date

Great Workout + Another Happy Clothes Moment

Could Have Eaten Three Cheesecakes Today